Dumb Bum Stories

every time i go to SF we get hit up by very aggressive bums. there are worse than the bums in Berkeley and Oakland.

ive had to pull out my knife a few times to get them to leave me and my daughter alone. ive chased them for a few blocks, punched a few, kicked a few.... the SF bums suck.
 
my roomate and i stepped out of our basement apt on labor day monday to smoke a cig, it was prolly 11am after a night of moderate to heavy drinking

anyways theres this bumb sitting on the stoop drinking SoCo out of a paper bag and we get to talking with him, long story short we end up drinking some SoCo with him on the stoop for an hour or so

Mad Dog, that guy
 
eh he offered, later on in the year we saw him and gave him some smokes when he wanted

also walked out of that same apt once and literally witnessed a crack deal on my stoop, that was pretty fucked
 
samUwell said:
every time i go to SF we get hit up by very aggressive bums. there are worse than the bums in Berkeley and Oakland.

ive had to pull out my knife a few times to get them to leave me and my daughter alone. ive chased them for a few blocks, punched a few, kicked a few.... the SF bums suck.
Click to expand...

Those SF bums go hard. I don't mind the street kids there at all, because they are just kids trying to survive. The older cats I have no sympathy for.

I would tell them nah I'm broke, and then they'd get pissed when I would take a group of kids that just got in town to the Carls Jr's that's right there in Civic Center.
 
Was walking to an early morning gig in NYC one day, passed Grand Central Station and saw a bum tottering sitting on some side entrance steps. After the job I walked back that same way and the guy was keeled over dead with clear fluid puddling by his mouth, and the cops roping him off till the meatwagon came. Uh, the end.
 
[strike]Two[/strike]three stories:

Downtown lansing mi, get out of a car to go to a bar. Bum comes up and asks to give money to a vietnam vet, he says he has proof. I look at his discharge papers and it says dishonorable discharge.

I laugh and walk away.

Same town, pull up to a party store to get something, bum flags me down. Says he needs change for a bus ride to somewhere, then shoes me his hole in his stomach, its like 3 inches wide and isnt bleeding. gave him a couple quarters for the show.


Downtown Detroit, its festive and a festival (dur) is going on. Bum starts screaming "GIVE ME MONEY I DONT HAVE ANY HANDS", mother fucker has no fingers, just nubs, on both of his hands. I tell him someone did that to him for a reason, and walk away.
 
Used to work in Sydney CBD, and there was a bum outside Wynyard station who would rock from side to side mumbling "Please spare a dollar... please spare a dollar..."

One morning I was walking past him and he was mumbling "Half price sale, only 50c... half price sale, only 50c..."

I :lol:'ed.
 
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