I saw it fall off his key chain and was gonna tell him but then evil ReCurve landed on my shoulder and whispered "lets see his porn". Long story short, no porn! There is some homework, and I thought this one was funny.
You Can’t Win a Fight with a Blind Man
Most rules and laws are clearly written down somewhere and some you just have to learn by trial and error. Peeing into the wind comes to mind, that one was easy, or you’re going to get a ticket if you are involved in a car accident while making a left turn. Being right or wrong or technically innocent has no bearings when it comes to the swift hands of Justice. And you can say whatever you want about justice. Justice is fair, quick, or pure, that all may be true, just never forget one fact: she’s one blind son of a bitch, and she sticks with her own kind.
To begin with, this story is how I learned the speed at which things can go from normal too crazy in the blink of an eye; and being technically right isn’t the same as being truly right. The oil in the truck needs changing, on our heroes list of things to do today this one stands out as the most enjoyable. Warm the truck up to proper operating temperatures, and assemble all tools and supplies to be needed. Slide under the red beast and began the task. Hear a tapping noise in the distance and the patter of feet. And obviously blind neighbor is up early walking his dog or is the dog walking him? Blind man walking! Didn't know we even had a blind guy living in the neighborhood, isn't diversity sweet. The patter in a tapping stop just a few feet away oh dear God the puppies dropping a deuce in the driveway. No big deal, he's not the first, Hell mines done the same thing before. Holy shit! Nobody’s picking it up! This travesty of justice will not stand.
Excuse me sir your dog just relieved himself in my driveway. Oh I'm sorry I didn't notice. Didn't notice? Could this be his first day with a service dog? Don't the blind have super smell? Didn’t he wonder why the dog is suddenly stopped; can this guy be fucking with me? Yes that's it, its game on. Our hero doesn't mind picking up the dog shit, Hell is probably the second best thing on his list of things to do today. It's the stupid act of innocence that he resents; blind guy knows what his dog did, his eyes may not work but they still manage to laugh in the face of our hero. While climbing out from under a pickup in a rage, one might not be to graceful or careful. Spilling a couple of gallons of filthy oil in the driveway does nothing to calm anybodies temper. Now there is two disgusting messes in the driveway, and Mr. Blind guy is defiantly cleaning at least one of them up, whether he likes it or not. That would after all be the fair thing for him to do.
There has been a rash of crimes in this community as of late, and police response times are at an all time low. The sight of an angry man covered in motor oil arguing with a blind man walking his service dog tends to draw the neighbors attention, the police were notified pretty early on in this altercation.
The blind man had an attitude right off the bat, no sense of shame or guilt, hell this gentleman was full on aggressive, and downright abusive. How does one deal with a person like this? Balling up his fist and approaching aggressively has worked in the past, so he goes with that thought. Mid stride he realizes This Guy Is Blind! A show of force isn’t going to work. At just this second, Wham! In the flash of an eye the blind man hit him in he face with the cane.
Did that just happen? Lucky shot maybe? Now our hero is hurt, and hurt bad, wiping away the blood from his face with filthy oily hands only adds to his rage, and confusion. Then the blind man steps forward, this time he’s the one acting aggressive. Whack! Another solid cane blow, this time to the neck. The blind man is a fake. No blind person could swing a cane that accurately, it’s not possible. Maybe he’s really near sighted, either that or he’s some kind of Jedi master with a fucked up light saber. Either way he can’t be completely blind, he must just be a poser jerk, who need to learn a lesson.
There are sirens in the distance, a lot of them; and they are getting close fast. Blind man raises his can for another blow; service dog is now going bat shit. One good shove is called for, anything at this point to avoid that fucking cane. Did somebody pray for pure justice? Why yes miss, step this way and help a brother out. The blind man was launched backwards, service dog wrapped around his feet, fighting the fall with everything he had. He might have just pulled it off if it wasn’t for the motor oil, and the dog shit. In a split second his feet were above his head, and down he went, and he landed hard.
It was a glorious sight to behold, that evil man, and his vile doge all tangled up and rolling around in the filthy mess they had created. A laugh was called for, a huge laugh, a bent over finger pointing GAFAW!!!!!!!
That’s when the police tires screeched to a stop, it must have been quite a site to behold. A bloody filthy homeless man in bunny slippers laughing hardily at a defenseless blind man rolling on the ground covered in dog shit and oil. Yep that’s a Taser.
On the ride to the station it was explained to our fallen hero in some detail, you can fight a deaf man, no big deal; retards are ok as well, as long as you stop before the fight goes to the ground. If a retard does have the super retard strength and manages to kill you, you’re just out of luck. The blind on the other hand are completely off limits, a protected class able to roam the earth, and terrorize the land. Justice is always on their side.
In conclusion what have we learned in this tale of pain and woe? Always keep your cool; a small argument can explode in the bat of an eye. Being right isn’t always the same as being correct. Never! Never! Get in a tussle with a blind man even if you win you just end up looking bad and not really winning anything.
I have to fuck with this kid
You Can’t Win a Fight with a Blind Man
Most rules and laws are clearly written down somewhere and some you just have to learn by trial and error. Peeing into the wind comes to mind, that one was easy, or you’re going to get a ticket if you are involved in a car accident while making a left turn. Being right or wrong or technically innocent has no bearings when it comes to the swift hands of Justice. And you can say whatever you want about justice. Justice is fair, quick, or pure, that all may be true, just never forget one fact: she’s one blind son of a bitch, and she sticks with her own kind.
To begin with, this story is how I learned the speed at which things can go from normal too crazy in the blink of an eye; and being technically right isn’t the same as being truly right. The oil in the truck needs changing, on our heroes list of things to do today this one stands out as the most enjoyable. Warm the truck up to proper operating temperatures, and assemble all tools and supplies to be needed. Slide under the red beast and began the task. Hear a tapping noise in the distance and the patter of feet. And obviously blind neighbor is up early walking his dog or is the dog walking him? Blind man walking! Didn't know we even had a blind guy living in the neighborhood, isn't diversity sweet. The patter in a tapping stop just a few feet away oh dear God the puppies dropping a deuce in the driveway. No big deal, he's not the first, Hell mines done the same thing before. Holy shit! Nobody’s picking it up! This travesty of justice will not stand.
Excuse me sir your dog just relieved himself in my driveway. Oh I'm sorry I didn't notice. Didn't notice? Could this be his first day with a service dog? Don't the blind have super smell? Didn’t he wonder why the dog is suddenly stopped; can this guy be fucking with me? Yes that's it, its game on. Our hero doesn't mind picking up the dog shit, Hell is probably the second best thing on his list of things to do today. It's the stupid act of innocence that he resents; blind guy knows what his dog did, his eyes may not work but they still manage to laugh in the face of our hero. While climbing out from under a pickup in a rage, one might not be to graceful or careful. Spilling a couple of gallons of filthy oil in the driveway does nothing to calm anybodies temper. Now there is two disgusting messes in the driveway, and Mr. Blind guy is defiantly cleaning at least one of them up, whether he likes it or not. That would after all be the fair thing for him to do.
There has been a rash of crimes in this community as of late, and police response times are at an all time low. The sight of an angry man covered in motor oil arguing with a blind man walking his service dog tends to draw the neighbors attention, the police were notified pretty early on in this altercation.
The blind man had an attitude right off the bat, no sense of shame or guilt, hell this gentleman was full on aggressive, and downright abusive. How does one deal with a person like this? Balling up his fist and approaching aggressively has worked in the past, so he goes with that thought. Mid stride he realizes This Guy Is Blind! A show of force isn’t going to work. At just this second, Wham! In the flash of an eye the blind man hit him in he face with the cane.
Did that just happen? Lucky shot maybe? Now our hero is hurt, and hurt bad, wiping away the blood from his face with filthy oily hands only adds to his rage, and confusion. Then the blind man steps forward, this time he’s the one acting aggressive. Whack! Another solid cane blow, this time to the neck. The blind man is a fake. No blind person could swing a cane that accurately, it’s not possible. Maybe he’s really near sighted, either that or he’s some kind of Jedi master with a fucked up light saber. Either way he can’t be completely blind, he must just be a poser jerk, who need to learn a lesson.
There are sirens in the distance, a lot of them; and they are getting close fast. Blind man raises his can for another blow; service dog is now going bat shit. One good shove is called for, anything at this point to avoid that fucking cane. Did somebody pray for pure justice? Why yes miss, step this way and help a brother out. The blind man was launched backwards, service dog wrapped around his feet, fighting the fall with everything he had. He might have just pulled it off if it wasn’t for the motor oil, and the dog shit. In a split second his feet were above his head, and down he went, and he landed hard.
It was a glorious sight to behold, that evil man, and his vile doge all tangled up and rolling around in the filthy mess they had created. A laugh was called for, a huge laugh, a bent over finger pointing GAFAW!!!!!!!
That’s when the police tires screeched to a stop, it must have been quite a site to behold. A bloody filthy homeless man in bunny slippers laughing hardily at a defenseless blind man rolling on the ground covered in dog shit and oil. Yep that’s a Taser.
On the ride to the station it was explained to our fallen hero in some detail, you can fight a deaf man, no big deal; retards are ok as well, as long as you stop before the fight goes to the ground. If a retard does have the super retard strength and manages to kill you, you’re just out of luck. The blind on the other hand are completely off limits, a protected class able to roam the earth, and terrorize the land. Justice is always on their side.
In conclusion what have we learned in this tale of pain and woe? Always keep your cool; a small argument can explode in the bat of an eye. Being right isn’t always the same as being correct. Never! Never! Get in a tussle with a blind man even if you win you just end up looking bad and not really winning anything.
I have to fuck with this kid
Pretty funny story overall, the kid is a fag who thinks it was fair even though the blind douche got the last laugh. If I were that kid I would spend the rest of my life putting dog shit outside the blind man's house and do other shit to make his life hell.
