I think she's certifiably fucking insane and belongs right where she is, 1200 miles away and not in contact with me.
Although it was pretty funny when a mutual friend pointed out that a guy who went out with her for a while (and then of course broke up with her, like they all do) recently posted on Facebook "holy fuck thank God I'm single again... no more crazy ladies for me"
I was half-tempted to message him and trade crazybitch stories, but decided against it. But I wish I did cuz I'm sure it would be hilarious.