[Official] My NYC story SuicideTaxi-style by ayz - TribalWar Forums
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1 - 07-08-2008, 14:01
First off, never fly American Airlines. I booked my ticket back in January/February, before they made the news with their plane trouble. I figured that 5-6 months is sufficient time for cleanup. False.

I leave work and arrive at the airport at 5pm for my 7pm flight, only to find that I was delayed until 8:50pm. At 8:00pm, my flight was pushed back to 10:50pm. The lady at the counter told me that they were doing maintenance on two of the plane's engines. It was a two-engine plane.

9:30pm, the flight is canceled. I cut in front of the line before a mob forms and manage to get put on a 10pm Delta flight.

I arrive at LaGuardia and there are no taxis in sight, but plenty of car service people. This arabic guy offers to take me into the city for a $45 flat fee. I later realize on my return trip that I got ripped off, since a cab is only $30, but whatever. As he exits the parking lot, he chats with the parking cashier in arabic for about 5 minutes. They exchange items like bowls of fruit, cartons of mott's apple juice, and what appeared to be an egg salad. It was ****ing weird.

I get to the hotel at around midnight, check in, and go meet everyone out at a bar with this huge lucky charm on it. Glare's eyes are rolling in the back of his head and he looks like he is about to pass out. Hellraisr is macking on a US Air Marshal. Fool, Fraggle, and Excel are sitting at the table just drinking beers. Fancy Cat makes rounds at the bar, hitting on these two old chicks next to this tall skinny Indian dude we will dub Creepy Ghandi. They tell me that Akuma is confined to the hotel room because he drank a 40 and started tackling newspaper dispensers in Times Square. Awesome.

The rest of the night was mostly just a chill hanging out night. I asked what a front butt was and fraggle grabs my hand in both of his and makes me touch his front butt. At one point we got the munchies, so Glare and Fraggle went to get some mediterranean food. Fancy Cat disappears. I head across the street and get a whole pepperoni pizza, bring it back into the bar, and start eating. I tell Hellrasir, Excel, and Fool to help themselves, at which point Creepy Ghandi thinks it's his cue to grab a slice. He reaches in and I ask him if he wants to die. A drunken Fool then removes a chunk of his slice and offers Creepy Ghandi the rest. Also, at this point Creepy Ghandi is visibly pissed because none of the three girls around him are paying attention to him anymore.

After food, we bounce with the US Air Marshall, her partner, and 2 MILFs. We look for strip clubs, but they are all closed. MILFs take a cab home, Air Marshall and her partner head back to their hotel which was 100 feet away, Fool and Hellraisr argue about who was cock blocking whom, and we all head home. FC, Hellrasir, Akuma, and Excel stay in one room. Fool, Glare, and myself are in the other.
Akuma calls us at 8am to tell us to come to the gym. We tell him to **** off and go to sleep. Akuma then calls us at 9am and tells us to come to the gym. I open tribalwar and see "[NWS] Get Out Your ****ing Checkbook" with a passed out Fancy Cat underwear modeling. Glad I wasn't in that room.

I head down to the gym. Fancy Cat is working out, doing sets. Excel is running on a treadmill. Akuma is wearing gym clothes, walking around, talking on his phone, and texting.

Fancy Cat doesn't know about "[NWS] Get Out Your ****ing Checkbook." Fancy Cat finds out about it. Fancy Cat is pissed.

Lunch time. Akuma insists on walking 10 blocks to meet this chick for lunch. We go 10 blocks and sweat our ass off to meet this chick, and only this chick, who turns out to be one of his exes. Hello everyone, welcome to the Akuma show. You are not permitted to change the channel.

During lunch, Akuma talks about how he is "well grounded" then proceeds to ask us if we know where to score some weed. It is now 1:30pm on a Thursday.

We finish up lunch, then cab it to the Metropolitan Museum of Art.

The Museum was awesome. Lots of cool art, and we were cracking a bunch of jokes and taking funny pictures. Ahh, sacrilege. In the asian art room, there were some masks that bore a pretty uncanny resemblance to me, so we took some pictures. "Frown a little to match the mask." "What?" "Pretend you got a 1400 on your SATs." At this point a group of 3 asian girls start giving us nasty looks.

We finish off the top floor of European art, the Asian exhibit, and the Hall of Arms. Akuma is now pestering everyone to leave and is trying to hustle everyone out ASAP. Apparently he told some girls we were going to meet them out at 3pm, and it is now 4pm. Out of consideration for Akuma and his girl friends, we taxi back to the hotel and change.

We leave the hotel and go to a bar in Little Italy near the restaurant we were supposed to eat dinner at. A deserted bar. With two old men in it. Akuma then tells us the girls are at a bar in midtown and too drunk to make it down before dinner. This next conversation pretty much sums up what it's like to argue with Akuma:

Me: "So why did we leave the museum early to go to a bar these people are not at?"
Akuma: "Because they're at a bar in Midtown getting drunk."
Me: "That wasn't an answer to my question."
Akuma: "I'm going to get a 40 brb."

Edit: While we are at the bar just drinking and telling stories, Akuma chimes in "Yeah back when I was in college" and it's like the record scratched. Everyone stops, "When the **** were you in college", "Don't you mean back when you were at verizon", "You mean back in that one time when you walked by a college campus"

Finally dinner rolls around. Akuma's ex (the tall blonde chick in the pic) and her friend show up. Skibbi shows up. MissJess shows up. We have a total of 11 people and Akuma reserved space for 15-16. The waiter asks him if we're going to use the extra table sitting empty at the end, to which he responds: "We have 1 more confirmed for sure, and maybe 6-7 more coming."

Waiters are pissed at us, as we are screaming "EYYYYY IT'S A ME, MARIO" or some variant every time they bring out a dish. It was an italian restaurant, obviously.

We head out to a bar to play beer pong, except the people there sucked and took forever. Fraggle meets us there, and we soon leave and head out to Karaoke, which was a blast.

According to Fraggle, you have to get the best bang for your buck out of Karaoke. Which means singing 10-minute long songs. Like "We are the world." With our own spins, of course. "We are the ones who make a brighter day \ So let's start giving \ EXCEPT TO THE JEWS." At this point the bartender already hates us. After the song, she tells us that if we're not going to sing the songs properly, then she will take the mics away. Fancy Cat apologizes, then gets on the mic and goes "I'm pretty sure we paid for each song like everyone else so we will sing what we want. Suck my dick suck my mother****ing dick."

Next song up: Adam Sandler, "At a Medium Pace". If you don't know this song, Google it. I was surprised it was even on the song list, along with "Chocolate Salted Balls" by the Southpark Chef aka Issac Hayes. Apparently not many people have heard "At a Medium Pace" before because the entire bar starts cracking up. Later that night, Fancy Cat sings it again, this time dedicating it to a girl at the end of the bar, whom he calls beautiful. The song starts. "Put your arms around me baby \ Can't you see I need you so \ Hold me close against your skin \ I'm about to be begin \ Loving you." The girl is smiling shyly, looking down at the bar, and blushing. Then the song starts.

"Spit on your hand and stroke my cock \ At a medium pace \ Play with my balls and tell me \ How big they are \ Honey, rub your beaver \ Up and down my face \ Sit on the corner of the bed \ And watch me whack off. \ You see that shampoo bottle \ Now stick it up my ass \ Push it in and out \ At a medium pace."

Her shy smile goes into a wide-eyed what the **** look. Her and her friends leave soon after.

Also, there was a bum outside who was tripping on shrooms or something. He would flex and stare at himself in the window, clearly engrossed by the neon lights. He then walked up to a movie poster with what appeared to be a 14 year old girl on it, jerked off, pissed, then lay down and went to sleep. In the same spot.

At around 2am, the bartender gets on the microphone. "Attention everyone. We will no longer be serving anyone at the bar any alcohol for the rest of the night. Thank you." The entire bar is cut off. Last call in NYC is at 4am. Hilarious.

We grab some pizza and head home for the night.
Hellraisr comes upstairs to wake us up. Apparently Akuma, Fancy Cat, and Excel left at like 6am to go to Akuma's aunt's house. We shower, get dressed, eat breakfast, then head out to pick up Slogg at the airport. Slogg lands and calls Hellraisr. "Hey Slogg, where are you?" "In the Newark airport." "..."

We go to Hellraisr's house so that I can look up NJ transit train times to get back on sunday, and because Glare has to shave. Great intro for his mom. "Hi Mom, I have 3 people from the internet coming. One has to shave and one needs to use your computer." BTW Hellraisr's parents were pretty cool. I stunk up their toilet. Hellraisr's dog is ecstatic to see Glare and immediately begins pissing on his leg.

Vintage is home. For those that don't know, Vintage is Hellrasir's teenage brother, and was completely creeped out by the fact that people from TribalWar were in his house. He retreats to his room to play xbox360, and only communicates with us in grunts.

As we head to a diner to eat lunch, Fancy Cat texts us. "The infamous house of 30 chicks is a house with 2 chicks and a dude. One chick is fat and ugly and the other is with the dude." 2 minutes later, "The fat chick just said she has to go take a ****. Awesome."

We get to the diner and our waitress is either ****ing high or retarded. She periodically stares out the window and starts swaying back and forth. She is confused about everything. She drops pens and **** all over the table. And it looked like she wanted to **** Slogg. She was cute, but since Slogg's last name isn't Cutillo, we finished our food and headed to the shore rather than spend the next 2 days in Hellraisr's back yard.

Akuma's aunt and uncle are really cool, and they have 2 hilarious kids. Glare told them my name was Tardwagon so that's what they called me the rest of the weekend. They also had some pretty badass nerf guns.

The upstairs attic was spacious and had 2 beds, mattress on the floor, sofa, and more space on the floor that could have slept 3-4 more people. It also had a ridiculous 60" Sony Bravia. I had no idea how they got the TV up there.

Akuma tells us it's party time and we're going to meet some girls or whatever then head to a house party. But the girls want beer. So we stop by the liquor store and Akuma and FC and Slogg go in to get alcohol. Slogg buys a case of beer, Fancy Cat pays for all the beer Akuma wants to buy for the chick(s). Akuma buys himself a 40. We're off.

We're at the house with 2 girls (one is in the one in pictures, the other is older and wrinkly and gross) and leave for this other house party. This "party" consits of a group of 40 year old men having a backyard bbq and 4-5 women clearly in their late 30's. There also 4 guys playing beer pong in the garage, and when I say beer pong I mean beer pong. Not college beer pong, not beirut. These dudes are playing ping pong, each with their beer cup on the table. If you make it in the cup, the other team has to take a drink. They also played to 21 and the losing team had to finish their beer. Sounds like a blast. I would be hard pressed to come up with a drinking game that required less drinking, except maybe taking a shot every time Akuma offers to pay for something. We want to leave, Akuma responds with "there's free beer (busch light) and food, what's the problem."

Earlier we had agreed to go to a bar called Jenk's and on retrospect, we should have gone there because it extends out to the beach and it has fireworks. Instead Akuma wants to go to this bar that Spitzer's hooker frequents. Hellraisr's got his friends to drive an hour out to meet us, except Akuma doesn't understand how to give directions to this new bar so they get lost. They get pissed at Hellraisr for flaking and changing location last minute. Akuma calls Hellraisr's friends retards. Hellraisr is pissed at Akuma. Everyone else is pissed because we just went from a house party with a bunch of middle aged dudes to an equally ****ty bar that charges cover.

At this point i am belligerent so I go to the bar, put about 4-5 straws together into a really long straw, and start walking around sneaking my straw into people's drinks. Eventually I stop before half the bar wants to kick my ass. We all decide this bar sucks and head out back to this chick's beach house (where the Fancy Cat incident occurs the night after).

We play beer pong. Me and Hellraisr lose to Glare and FC by 1 cup. Then we come back and beat them the next game.

After spending a bit of time there we start talking about how dumb the day was. Akuma gets self-righteous, I get pissed, and I call him out for the laundry list of ****. Basically it went something like this:

Me: "We left the museum early because you wanted to chase some chicks. We went to a sausage party becasue you wanted to follow these chicks. We flaked on Hellraisr's friends and went to this ****ty bar because you wanted to follow these chicks. Everything you ****ing do is based on chicks and getting laid. You haven't planned **** this entire trip."
Akuma: "I asked everyone if they wanted girls on this trip and they said yes."
Me: "Nobody is going to say no unless they're gay. But that means they would like to go out in the company of chicks, obviously, not that they want to make this entire trip about getting chicks. What is wrong with you."
Akuma: "You guys said you wanted chicks. I'm doing what I can to make things happen."

We then decide we all want to go back to NYC on saturday. Akuma refuses to go. We tell him we all bought plane tickets to NY because of him, because he said he was on a budget, because we wanted to hang out with him, so will he go to NYC. He says no. I tell him he hasn't (nor will he) pay for **** on this trip. FC and Fraggle and Skibbi have pretty much paid for alcohol the whole time, and I will book another night at the hotel on my points, and we will even chip in for the gas back. He can go to NYC for another day with zero expenses. Akuma still refuses to go. I ask him why he refuses to come to NYC with all of us with zero expense overhead and his reply is "because it like it here in jersey." I told him that he is a ****ty host, that Hellraisr planned all the logistics, that one of my close friends from college flew down last minute from Boston to Atlanta for the 4th, but I didn't want to cancel on everyone so I let her stay at my place and came up anyways (she hung out with some mutual friends of ours in ATL), and right now I would rather be back home because NJ is so ****ing stupid. Akuma shrugs and goes "dude." At this point I don't know what the **** his malfunction is so I give up.

Slogg is drunk and passed out so we leave him with the chick at her beach house. Underlying idea is that he gets some action since she was on his junk the whole weekend. We head back to the beach house tonight and everyone is seriously entertaining the idea of going to see Hancock in the morning then driving back to NYC. I say **** it, call up American Airlines to book a flight back the next day to go hang out with my friend. The earliest available flight is 7pm on Saturday, but I can't book it until 12 hours prior. I fall asleep and set my alarm for 6:45 am.
I wake up tired as hell, turn off my alarm, and go to sleep. Needless to say I didn't make that 7pm flight; it was booked full by the time I woke up. We all wake up a little more cool headed. Excel and slogg really want to see the beach so we agree to stay in NJ. We eat some pizza and head for the beach. The water is cold as ****; Slogg and I are pussies and refuse to get in. Eventually we do, and I start swimming for deeper waters because it's warmer. I almost made it to China but then had to stop before I got too far out to deal with the undertow. We spend the early part of the afternoon chilling at the beach and tossing a football around.

We head back to the beach house, shower, change, and head back to the chick's house for some pregaming before going out. Note that it is about 3pm. Again, FC buys a bunch of beer and some vodka. Akuma buys himself a 40. I get a bottle of Jack. Good to go.

I start double fisting Jack&Coke and Stoli Raz because I like to drink both. I also eat about 10 push-pops. I have no idea what the time is. Around 5pm I crawl into her bed and take a nap. I wake up at 8pm and we are ready to head out to the bar.

This bar is really cool, called Jenkins' or whatever. First off, it is HUGE. Second, there's a back patio that extends out onto the beach, then steps to go down, and they have tables and chairs set up in the sand on the beach. Awesome. Third, outside the bar there's concession stands, carnival games (football toss through the tire, ring toss, etc), and just random ****.

Overall the night was a blast but here's where bits and pieces of drama start cropping up.

Akuma says he has a hookup to get people in for free. He then says he can only get 5 more people in for free because there's a limit. So he gets Fancy Cat in for free (because FC has paid for everything up to this point), along with his 4 myspace whores, and goes "sorry guys" and leaves the rest of us to pay the cover charge.

Then, he says he has this bartender hookup named JT or whatever who will give us drinks cheap. So he orders everyone drinks and stuff. I have maybe 2 bud lights. Glare buys his own drinks because he doesn't think Akuma's "hookup" is going to go through. Akuma orders everyone else bud lights. The chicks start getting vodka and tonics and whatever. The party starts.

Halfway through the night, I see FC walking around in a daze. It turned out FC went to order a drink on Akuma's tab. Akuma's "hookup" bartender is nowhere in sight. The other bartender comes back with an $80 tab and makes FC pay it. FC is now drunk and annoyed. I pull him out of the bar, we grab some food, and then I give him some cash to cover the fact that he had to buy most of the alcohol all weekend.

Fast forward to the end of the party. Akuma says he had to pay a $280 tab, and proceeds to ***** all night about how his bank account is overdrafted. He probably repeated this at least 20 times. We get to this girl's house, this time with 4 other girls in tow, and start playing beer pong. Akuma spills a carton of strawberries on the floor, picks them up, starts throwing some, then grabs a carton of blueberries and starts eating them. More drinking and beer pong ensue until FC goes and mule kicks the bedroom door. A few minutes later this chick comes out and tells us we have to leave and get FC out of there. FC is pissed. Some **** happens, I won't outline the details since FC made his own post about it. Ends with me driving Akuma's car, Hellraisr driving his own, FC wanting to fight people and the chick threatening to call the cops.
Fancy Cat's Saturday night story:

Originally Posted by Fancy Cat View Post
basically akumas house of 30 women which consisted one 1 stupid ***** and her boyfriend offered all of us to crash there.

we were reluctant to the first night and decided not to, but akuma kept pushing it the second night. well we all got so hammered that night (it was our big night out) that it sounded like a great deal. we were all actually having a good time for a change in jersey, and it had nothing to do with akuma hooking us up. we had just accepted the fact that he was out for himself and only himself and we all just had fun.

we were getting pretty drunk. at one point i donkey kicked her door open. people were just being loud and obnoxious, it was like 1 or 2am. akuma got some strawberries out of her fridge and started throwing them all over the house. then, without warning she kicks us all out. drunk as ****, want about 13 people to leave her house that she invited us to and begged us to stay at knowing full well we were all going to get slammed. i think it had to do with her boyfriend, which is another story (apparently they have an open unopen relationship where she ****s mike and other guys and he ****s girls other than her). anyhow, with no warning or asking us to calm down, she kicks us all out.

we were all caught off guard and i was like "holy ****, how are we going to get anywhere?" we had been buying this ***** all her drinks ALL DAY and she kicks us out. I alone had spent around $400 that day on beers and liquor for her place. she didn't pay for **** at the bar either.

and now she's forcing us to leave without warning, drunk, and apparenly we have to ride in the car with drunks to mikes aunt and uncle's attic with about 13 people.

i get in the car and realize that a lot of the booze i had bought and beer was still in her fridge. i said "**** that" and got out of the car. ryan got in front of me to stop me but i tossed him out of the way and stormed in. i grabbed my booze, walked up to the chick and her boyfriend and said "congrats on the best relationship ever. you **** other guys (pointing to the girl) and you **** other girls (pointing at the guy). best relationship ever. i'm out, peace."

i was still fuming when i got in hellraisrs car. i was pretty mad at mike too since he was the reason we were even in the situation. i told him just to drop me off at a motel, but he wouldn't. he drove me around for a while and cooled my jets.

that night i almost booked a flight home. the next morning i go downstairs to shower and mike's uncle offers to cook me pancakes since he has all the ingredients out. I say "sure sounds great"

mike comes down and his uncle says to mike "anyone else want breakfast i can make pancakes for everyone" to which mike responds "there are two girls up there that probably do."

i fury kicked in again and i went over to mike and said "hey how about you invite the GUYS down too?"

i was pissed

the dude really does only look out for himself and his *****.
Hellraisr's post-Fancy Cat rage 7-11 Story

Originally Posted by HeLLrAiSr View Post
Fancy Cat 7-11 story:

After Fancy Cat was fuming as posted in his previous story he mentioned me driving him around to cool off. While this did happen, he left a few things out which I'd be happy to fill in.

In the car ride home from the house of 30 nonexistant women, FancyJoe was indeed fuming. He wanted to kill someone, and I wasn't really about to let that happen. The car had Fancy Cat, Akuma and two girls that came to the club with us that night.

Fancy was in the front seat, akuma in the back with the two girls. I thought fancy was going to start bulging veins and turning a shade of green, but thankfully it didn't happen...he was REALLY upset at the notion of getting kicked out of the house where we were supposed to stay for a few reasons. He mentioned the money spent on beer, which Fc already mentioned before, the idea of people driving drunk (even though myself and ayz who drove akumas car were both sober by that point), and hearing the door slamming when we were pulling out. FC wasn't too happy about that.

Akuma was doing his best to calm FC down during the car ride, which was about 10 minutes long. Akuma and the 2 girls get out (after i told them absolutely not to dropping them off at their houses) at akumas aunts house where we all were staying, and FC stays in the car with me. I told him (or we both decided) it would be best to have him calm down instead of him walking into akumas aunts house in a fit of rage. I drove around to the nearest 7-11, which I had to search for because of the ****in fog off the ocean. That was fun.

We get to the 7-11 and this is one of the funniest parts of the trip for me. I'm about 6' myself and FC towers over me. We walk into the 7-11 and FC makes a b-line for the bottles of water, and the indian dude working the counter stares at him, then at me. All i say is "yeah he's...big" making a hand motion to show height with my hand above me. I ask FC if he wants anything and try to grab the **** and pay for it, he goes "WHAT THE **** ARE YOU KIDDING ME, YOURE NOT PAYING FOR ANYTHING" At this point I wasn't going to argue with him :p

So he goes up to the counter and asks for a pack of cigs and a lighter, and picks a white bic lighter and puts it on the counter. The indian guy, much to my chagrin says to FC "white is bad luck, shouldn't pick white."

I just look at him and think to myself FC looks at him and this is what follows:

FancyCat: White isn't a bad color, whites a good color. BLACK is a bad color.

Stupid: No black is good luck, white is bad luck you are wrong!

FancyCat: No you're black and you're bad luck. I hate you, you're dumb.

Stupid: I am black, I hate you too.

FancyCat: (as he walks out) I hope you die, you're the worst person I have ever met. You are black, sups.

Stupid: OK watch for car accident!

That ticked me off, but whatever. Afterwards Fancy was telling me how great of an idea it would be to tackle the girls refridgerator and break her appliances. I drove him back to Akumas aunts house, after he was all calmed down.

The next morning I pack and get ready to leave. We all come downstairs, Akuma's uncle makes us pancakes. Then we head outside for a little team meeting discussion. Apparently while FC and Akuma were sitting at the kitchen table, his uncle asked if any of his friends wanted breakfast. Akuma says "nah but there are two girls who probably want food." His uncle goes "yeah but what about your friends" at which point FC says "Mike why don't you go ****ing ASK the guys if they want some food."

Edit: Oh, when we woke up, the first thing Akuma says is "LOL last night was crazy but even with all the drama going on, i still got laid, how awesome is that, LOL"

Akuma again mentions that the one bar tab he paid for the entire trip overdrafted his bank account and has the nerve to ask everyone to pay him back (besides FC). Nevermind the fact that he was the one ordering all the drinks, most of them were for those chicks anyways, and it was his fault the "hookup" he counted on fell through. Hellraisr told him to **** off. I told him I may paypal him later but now I've decided i'm not giving him a dime either. He again brings up how he's overdrafted. I ask him if he is still going to split my extra $100 in cab and train fees like he said he would, because he didn't want to pick me up from the airport. He shrugs, again mentions that he's overdrafted, and heads back inside."

At this point FC tells me about the breakfast conversation story, and Glare points out that as a rule, he never, ever buys drinks for Akuma, because Akuma never does anything for anyone else except for chicks he is trying to bang.

I go up to get my stuff, Glare goes upstairs and gives me $20 to help cover my cab fare, I give it to Hellraisr, along with $20 I gave him the night before, since he graciously drove us around all weekend without complaint on a broke college student's budget.
Re: Austin of last year
Just to put things into perspective before I start voicing my opinions, here are some excerpts from Austin last year.

FC, Glare, and I take turns buying rounds for everyone, paying for cabs, etc. Akuma pays for 1 cab to dinner (that was like $15) and asks everyone to pay him back. We told him no because he hasn't paid for ****. Akuma pays for dinner to compensate.

We're sitting by the pool all day and FC wants to order a round of margaritas. He tells Akuma to take cash from his wallet and order a round. Akuma then proceeds to bring out 10 more rounds during the course of the day, as well as rounds for random ugly chicks with flapjack **** that were around the pool. When we got out of the pool, FC checks his wallet. He took out $200 from the ATM that morning and had $20 left. Akuma's response to this was "I bought like 2-3 of those rounds man." The fact that he spent an additional $160 of Fancy Cat's money without asking didn't seem to register in his head.

Later that night Akuma calls Glare cheap and Glare is ready to bash his face in.
Overall, the NYC trip and the last day of NJ was enjoyable. However, given a choice, I would have probably stayed another day in NYC with Fool, seen more sights, then just headed home. However, I consider this trip a learning experience.

I feel bad for Excel and Fool because they were really looking forward to seeing the city and we got cut short at the museum. Fool made the right choice in going home on Friday. Then again, Excel got to see the beach.

Fraggle is a cool guy in person. He talks the same **** he does online, but obviously joking. Plus he is a generous person. I still think he has no self-respect and is too fat for his own good, and I'm sure he still thinks I suck, but I would hang out with him again.

It's pretty standard fare with Fancy Cat and Glare. We hang out like usual and all get pissed at Akuma at some point in the trip.

Was good to meet MissJess, she's a nice person. So is Skibbi, who I haven't seen since TW:East. And Sloggles.

Hellraisr could gain some weight but he is a cool guy. He drove us around everywhere, invited us to his house, offered to pay for **** even though he is a broke college student. He also planned all of the logistics of the trip, FYI, since Akuma seemed incapable of doing so.

Everyone we met on the trip (except snakes, from what I hear) was great and I would gladly hang out with them again.

As for Akuma, there is the learning experience. He is a spaz IRL. He has no idea what hospitality means. He is cheap and has no regard for anyone besides himself and chicks he is trying to bang. Usually when we go on trips, people take turns picking up the tab and food and whatnot. I have never seen Akuma pay for anything for anyone until Saturday night, and that ended with him asking everyone to pay him back on sunday morning. I agree with Glare, from now on the rule of thumb is to not buy Akuma any drinks or food or anything. Part of it is that Akuma is terrible at money management and is always on a budget/broke, but at the same time, when he does spend money, he prioritizes his myspace sluts over anyone else.

When making travel plans on how to get to/from NYC, I believe everyone remembers that thread where they wanted to split gas and tolls and **** like that. I asked Akuma if he was really going to nickle and dime us on gas and tolls. His response was "but Hellraisr is a poor student so we have to split expenses." I told him that doesn't explain why he wants people to split HIS gas and tolls, and he gave me the same broken record answer back. The guy will say random **** that doesn't make sense to try and justify whatever it is he wants to do.

I'm sure he thinks he means well but it doesn't seem to register in his head. All he thinks is "chicks are awesome. we have chicks. everyone is going to get laid this will be awesome." Regardless of what you say or what you want to do, nothing will register because that is all he is focused on, with total disregard for anyone and anything else.

I'm not opposed to hanging out with him again. Just not at anything he has planned, and not on my dime. The problem is the guy doesn't even see the things other people do for him, i.e. paying for his stuff, or booking plane tickets and planning vacation locations purely on account of him. But the second a dime leaves his pocket, he starts keeping score. I have a shorter fuse than Glare or Fancy Cat and in general have no patience for that kind of behavior.

I've spoken to akuma multiple times since the trip ended and we have kind of smoothed things over on our own part. Lessons learned on both ends. However, this post still serves as my honest opinion and account of what happened during the trip. This thread did spiral a bit beyond what I expected but I don't feel bad for saying what I did. Nothing I posted here is something I have not already brought up with him personally.

Originally Posted by fraggle View Post
11:37:31 AM fraggle: go post in my thread the natives are getting restless
11:38:17 AM z2AkumA: im not posting man. 2 sides to every story. its a mob against one.
11:38:28 AM z2AkumA: joe is about 80% right, and hes all i care about really
Good quote there. I'm sure he didn't mean it to sound like "everyone else can **** off", but the sad truth is that as long as Fancy Cat still stands up for him he probably doesn't give a **** what anyone else says. I'm sure everyone that went on this trip appreciates this little tidbit.

Fraggle's story about everything prior to my arrival:

Originally Posted by fraggle View Post
since gon3 isn't banned i've decided to tell the story, and maybe in the spirit of goodwill rayn will let gon3 live to see another day.

the tw akuma meet was scheduled to go down on july 2nd, a wednesday. on june 30th, akuma ims me to see if i have any ideas on what to do with the guys in nyc. being cautiously optimistic, i asked him if he seriously didn't have anything planned out. at this point akuma tried to brush that remark off saying any bar with "cheep" beer would be ok with the group. i suggested a few touristy things like the SI ferry that might appeal to the group and akuma brushed those off stating that the group wouldn't be into touristy stuff at all.

the morning of july 2nd akuma texts me at 8am. i was sleeping. so he texted me again at 8:30am. i was still sleeping. finally he called and woke me up at quarter to 10. he wanted to make sure i was still going to the airport at 1pm. i said sure and akuma told me he was already in manhattan, and gonna get an early start on getting to the airport. i said great and hung up.

i left my house at around noon, and when i was 10 mins away from the airport fancy texts me to tell me he's landed. i tell him to meet me somewhere and a few minutes later excel texts me. i pick them both up and akuma hadn't gotten to the airport yet. so much for the early start. me, excel and fancy cat headed over to get some chicken and waffles while akuma waited for glare at the airport, and then i dropped the two of them off at their hotel and i went home to drop my car off.

when i returned to the group they were at applebees drinking coors lights and other crappy domestic beers. i spent a few minutes making fun of the gay waiter for not having any decent beer on tap, then i drank a quick one and we headed out of applebees. i should note that it took like 20 mins for us to pay our tabs because akuma was arguing over a two dollar discrepancy on the 'forced gratuity' or something. one would think i wasn't the token jew there.

so the guys headed up to the hotel room to change, and i told them that they shouldnt wear flip flops because i had secured us all free passes to the hustler club and their dress code dictates no flip flops/sandals. akuma argues for around 10 mins stating that there is no way in hell he will go out without flip flops because 'thats all i wear.' after being a baby for quite awhile, akuma finally gave in and threw some sneakers on at the urging of fancy cat.

at this point i walked the group over to the 42nd street train station and we boarded the train to head to this bar called zum schneider in alphabet city. the train was packed because it was rush hour, and pretty much everyone was grinding on each other. glare kept rubbing against this pretty hot chick who in turn was giving me dirty looks because there wasn't enough space for her to face glare. excel seemed kind of overwhelmed in the packed train because it was his first subway ride ever. at this point the group was me, excel, fancy, raisr, glare and akuma.

so we get off the train at union square and its a good 15-20 minute walk from there to the bar. i told fancy it was just a few blocks because he's fat and lazy and likes to take cabs everywhere. akuma started almost immediately after leaving the train yelling about how he wanted a 40. so we get to a grocery store and akuma picks up a 40 of molson ice. i said to him dude, have you ever even drank a 40 before? the only way to properly drink a 40 is to drink oe. so i picked him out a 40 of oe and bought it for him. it was the 2nd drink i saw akuma have that day. he seemed proud of himself when he finished it.

after awhile we arrived at the bar and fancy was *****ing about the long walk. i ordered a few liters of optimator and we sat down at a large table. well almost all of us did. akuma decided to sit down with some middle aged guys and join in on their conversation. pretty much the first thing he did when he sat down was start drinking this one guy's beer. since it was a beer that was just put down, the guy just let akuma finish it. akuma then started eating their food. i might have found this behavior weird and commented on it, but hellraisr claimed that is pretty much normal behavior for akuma.

i was two liters of optimator down when snakes showed up. snakes is a fag. he came in wearing a scoop necked girls t-shirt and started lecturing me on misogynism when i tried to get him to join us at the hustler club after. then he ditched the group. **** snakes. finally the loud behavior of the group got us cut off at the bar, and even though i am under control 100% of the time, i was outnumbered by loud drunk people so we had to leave. fancy had downed 3 liters of optimator at this point. akuma downed two beers at this bar, both were of the .3 liter variety. he was nursing a liter optimator but finished maybe half of it before giving up.

when we left the bar we got some pizza. after pizza is when **** got interesting. on our walk back to the train station, akuma decided to rip a few garbage cans that were chained to a building off of the building. while ripping them off he yelled WOOOO at the top of his lungs. people started yelling at him from out the windows of these buildings, but akuma didnt care. he just started cackling and running forward. as he'd approach new people, akuma would raise his shirt to flash them while yelling out OOOO or WOOO or CHECK IT or some other retarded nonsense phrase. after flashing a good 10-12 people, he decided to threaten to stab some people. one of these people was a ghetto looking black girl. "IM GONNA STAB YOU ******," he yelled, and she started chasing after him finally giving up after half a block. akuma then started doing cartwheels... 3 of em. we were finally right at the train station when akuma approached a row of newspaper metal lockboxes, then proceeded to tackle them, dropping 3 to the ground. mind you the sun is still out, its like 8:20pm and theres a ton of pedestrian traffic in the area. akuma got up and was bleeding profusely from 2 spots on his leg. awesome. we took the train up to 42nd, and i told fancy that we should just drop akuma off at the hotel because he's out of control.

fancy decided that akuma was ok, and gave akuma a pep talk. "mike i need you to act like you're okay, can you do that mike" akuma said yes so we went to a pharmacy to try to patch up his wounds so that he wouldn't be leaking blood trying to get into a strip club. while the group was trying to gauze/tape up his wounds, akuma started yelling woo and trying to dance. so yea, the tape job wasnt really done right. at this point i talked to fancy again and again tried to convince him to drop akuma at the room. again fancy fought for akuma saying that akuma would be fine, not to worry, etc. about 5 seconds later akuma did a cartwheel, ran up to some chick, flashed her and yelled something random.

we had a group talk and everyone agreed that akuma needed to stay in the hotel. in retrospect i think this was akuma's plan all along, because he didn't want to go to the strip club because he's broke as a joke. this is just my opinion of course. so we drop akuma off and we head over to the hustler club. i had free internet passes for everyone so we avoided the $20 cover. end of story.
ayz is offline
Last edited by ayz; 07-17-2008 at 11:33..
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2 - 07-08-2008, 14:02
mstrike is offline
3 - 07-08-2008, 14:03
mstrike i thought you were going to this event
9Millimeter is offline
Lord Elessar
or something
4 - 07-08-2008, 14:04
should have put bel air at the end just for the hell of it.
Lord Elessar is offline
5 - 07-08-2008, 14:07
Originally Posted by 9Millimeter View Post
mstrike i thought you were going to this event
I had no place to stay because it would be "disrespectful" if I slept in his aunt's house for some reason.

He IM'ed me on Saturday and told me that he found a place for me to crash, but I had already made plans for the night.
mstrike is offline
6 - 07-08-2008, 14:08
working out

Falhawk is offline
7 - 07-08-2008, 14:09
Good story.
ptavv is offline
8 - 07-08-2008, 14:09
sweet, more
Blotter is offline
Lord Elessar
or something
9 - 07-08-2008, 14:09
entire bar cutoff at 2am wtf? was everyone really that far gone?
Lord Elessar is offline
10 - 07-08-2008, 14:11
totally chill duder
Al'Muktar is offline
11 - 07-08-2008, 14:11
Originally Posted by Lord Elessar View Post
entire bar cutoff at 2am wtf? was everyone really that far gone?
The problem wasn't us, it was the bartender. I've been rowdy in bars before and its all in good fun, but this ***** behind the bar was ridiculous. As fool said in another thread to the same effect, she was the busiest unoccupied person behind a bar i've ever seen. Also, wtf are you working in a karaoke bar if you don't like the way people are ****ing singing specific songs. Dumb *****

that gave me a good chuckle
HeLLrAiSr is offline
Fireman X
12 - 07-08-2008, 14:12
thanks for today. I'm bored at work.

edit: lol @ the mario thing
Fireman X is offline
Last edited by Fireman X; 07-08-2008 at 14:18..
13 - 07-08-2008, 14:12
Akuma calls us at 8am to tell us to come to the gym. We tell him to **** off and go to sleep. Akuma then calls us at 9am and tells us to come to the gym.

Akuma is wearing gym clothes, walking around, talking on his phone, and texting.
cancer is offline
14 - 07-08-2008, 14:13
1st page
munkeydung is offline
thereal Shaolinmonk
15 - 07-08-2008, 14:14
the met is pretty sweet, never enough time in there..
thereal Shaolinmonk is offline
16 - 07-08-2008, 14:17
Originally Posted by HeLLrAiSr View Post
The problem wasn't us, it was the bartender. I've been rowdy in bars before and its all in good fun, but this ***** behind the bar was ridiculous. As fool said in another thread to the same effect, she was the busiest unoccupied person behind a bar i've ever seen. Also, wtf are you working in a karaoke bar if you don't like the way people are ****ing singing specific songs. Dumb *****

that gave me a good chuckle
She sucked. We spent a good amount of time and money in that bar. It would have been pretty empty (and boring) without us.
MissJess is offline
17 - 07-08-2008, 14:18
Us and the bum

dont forget the bum
HeLLrAiSr is offline
18 - 07-08-2008, 14:18
hey bartender where's my shot

i only want my shot so i can leave you a good tip

hello is this mic working
ayz is offline
19 - 07-08-2008, 14:21
does this cement akuma as that guy now?
anomaly is offline
20 - 07-08-2008, 14:22
Funny ayz. The museum is in midtown.
AdreNaLiNe is offline
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