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RabbitRabbi
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1 - 06-12-2009, 03:16
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I ****ed this broad with fake **** for about a year. One morning after a night dirty drunken sex together she woke up and her left boob was busted. Her insurance covered it and she got a new set in a few days.
 
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SirBatesAlot
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2 - 06-12-2009, 03:20
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cool story hansel

I guarantee that's happened before.

I myself have hit 18 straight hole in ones.
 
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afex
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3 - 06-12-2009, 03:20
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i've had sex on a three-wheeler out in the middle of the woods

sounds pretty original
 
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Zanthious
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4 - 06-12-2009, 03:25
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i hijacked a steamroller once
 
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Geck0
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5 - 06-12-2009, 03:27
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I had sex with a three-wheeler out in the middle of the woods
 
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Orestes
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6 - 06-12-2009, 03:35
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I hijacked a three wheeler and drove it out to the middle of the woods to have sex with a steamroller once
 
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internet
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7 - 06-12-2009, 03:35
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durak had sex
 
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Archimedes
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8 - 06-12-2009, 03:36
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I doubt I am the only one to have ever done most of these things, but whatever. In the realm of serious answers:

I've met Earl Campbell, Doug English, and a myriad of other famous football players from the University of Texas.

I went on a road trip in less than 24 hours to see Opeth, and then went to work as soon as I got home with barely any sleep.

I went to Paganfest.

I've been backstage with and partied with Spoonfed Tribe on numerous occasions.

I fingered a girl the first night meeting her and only to end up with a fistful of period blood.

I had a one-night stand with a non-practicing Mormon who told me she couldn't continue dating me because I didn't believe in god.

I know one of the team doctors for the Houston Texans, the Houston Rockets, and the Rice Owls.

Aaaand that's all I really feel like typing up right now. I know a lot of that isn't really exciting, but
 
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Tribalbob
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9 - 06-12-2009, 03:46
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touched my penis
 
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Elvis Hitler
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10 - 06-12-2009, 03:48
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I once warmed up two blocks of C4 in each of my armpits while I made an improvised beehive shaped demolition charge. It was -25C outside
 
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Le Sean
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11 - 06-12-2009, 03:49
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Was in Vegas a few years ago and got really drunk. Managed to sit through an entire episode of Last Call with Carson Daily.
 
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JoMo
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12 - 06-12-2009, 03:50
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I had sex with afex on a 3-wheeler in the woods, while watching some guy have sex with a steamroller.
 
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SuicideSnowman
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13 - 06-12-2009, 03:56
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Archimedes View Post
I went on a road trip in less than 24 hours to see Opeth, and then went to work as soon as I got home with barely any sleep.
I actually took off work (I work 3rd shift) about 4 hours early so I could drive 12 hours without stopping other than for gas, slept at the hotel for about an hour, went to the concert, came back and drank at the hotel bar until 3 in the morning then woke up about 5 hours later to make the 12 hour drive back. I was tired as **** for a few days.
 
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Archimedes
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14 - 06-12-2009, 03:59
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That sounds awesome. Was it for Opeth as well? It was probably the most amazing concert I have ever seen.. it was like a religious experience.
 
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starwolf_nexus
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15 - 06-12-2009, 04:00
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When I was 5 I ran a mud bog race (on foot) in mud deep enough for the modified jeeps and **** three times, came in first twice due to some other jackass jumping the gun and then having to restart and by the third time in which he/they didn't start early, I had dropped to third.
 
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SuicideSnowman
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16 - 06-12-2009, 04:01
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Archimedes View Post
That sounds awesome. Was it for Opeth as well? It was probably the most amazing concert I have ever seen.. it was like a religious experience.
Yeah it was Opeth with Dream Theater.
 
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SuicideTaxi
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17 - 06-12-2009, 04:01
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I ****ed two chicks on the Riverwalk in New Orleans one Mardi Gras while they were dressed in diapers and sucking on pacifiers haha

I flipped over in a pickup truck at about 60 mph and walked away without a scratch (wasnt driving)

I got tackled by like six cops once... after I wouldn't lay down in the dirt after some dumb**** cop thought I was a burglar walking down the side of my own house

12 years old, I jumped a creek in a 1974 Plymouth Duster running from the cops, after we borrowed/stole the car off the farm that I got exiled to one summer (not dukes of hazzard-style jumped a creek, it was tiny... but it was a creek)

I stuck my tongue in a guy's mouth in the middle of a club's dance floor once, thinking it was my girlfriend (long story... barf )

I'm 99.9 percent positive I've seen a ghost (like for real... not "hey I heard a creak in the floor, must be a ghost!", I mean like a for-real ghost)

I got drunk with Mickey Roarke

I got drunk with Stephen Spielberg

Jewel ground her ***** into my thigh and asked me to go home with her... and I turned her down cuz A) I didn't know who she was, and B) I was hung up and aggravated about my ex-girlfriend, who was also in the bar

I got my picture in the paper after wiping out an entire block full of stuff in a pretty bad drunk driving misadventure

I've been strip-searched

I sat in a real A-10 on a flight line

I got called a "ruffian" by Geraldo Rivera... back when he was on Channel 7 news in New York City... (me and my friends were heckling him while he was doing an on-the-scene broadcast, and he went to the cops and went "Officer... can you do something about those RUFFIANS??" We were calling each other "ruffians" for years afterwards, lulz)

Had a Heineken bottle broken across my face... and somehow only got bruised, not a scratch



That's all I can think of.
 
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Last edited by SuicideTaxi; 06-12-2009 at 04:05..
JoMo
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18 - 06-12-2009, 04:01
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SuicideTaxi View Post
I ****ed two chicks on the Riverwalk in New Orleans one Mardi Gras while they were dressed in diapers and sucking on pacifiers haha

I flipped over in a pickup truck at about 60 mph and walked away without a scratch (wasnt driving)

I got tackled by like six cops once... after I wouldn't lay down in the dirt after some dumb**** cop thought I was a burglar walking down the side of my own house

12 years old, I jumped a creek in a 1974 Plymouth Duster running from the cops after we borrowed/stole the car off the farm that I got exiled to one summer (not dukes of hazzard-style jumped a creek... but it was a creek)

I stuck my tongue in a guy's mouth in the middle of a club's dance floor once, thinking it was my girlfriend (long story... barf )

I'm 99.9 percent positive I've seen a ghost (like for real... not "hey I heard a creak in the floor, must be a ghost!", like a for-real ghost)

I got drunk with Mickey Roarke

I got drunk with Stephen Spielberg

Jewel ground her ***** into my thigh and asked me to go home with her... and I turned her down cuz A) I didn't know who she was, and B) I was hung up and aggravated about my ex-girlfriend, who was also in the bar

I got my picture in the paper after wiping out an entire block full of stuff in a pretty bad drunk driving misadventure

I've been strip-searched

I sat in a real A-10 on a flight line

I got called a "ruffian" by Geraldo Rivera... back when he was on Channel 7 news in New York City (me and my friends were heckling him while he was doing an on-the-scene broadcast, and he went to the cops and went "Officer... can you do something about those RUFFIANS??" We were calling each other "ruffians" for years afterwards, lulz)

Had a Heineken bottle broken across my face... and somehow only got bruised, not a scratch



That's all I can think of.
I just had to quote this...............
 
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Archimedes
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19 - 06-12-2009, 04:06
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SuicideSnowman View Post
Yeah it was Opeth with Dream Theater.
Oh jesus, that must have been so badass. High on Fire and Baroness opened for Opeth, but I only got there in time to see High on Fire. They sucked something awful.

However, I have been right up front for Nile and Behemoth. That **** was brutally awesome.
 
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Musashi
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20 - 06-12-2009, 04:09
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stared down a taliban commander
 
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