[TribalWarrior on Sci-Fi] Gameshow starts tonight (Tues/Mar10) @ 9cst/10est plzwatch! by SexPistol - Page 43 - TribalWar Forums
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Reload this Page [TribalWarrior on Sci-Fi] Gameshow starts tonight (Tues/Mar10) @ 9cst/10est plzwatch!
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SexPistol
VeteranX
Old
841 - 04-21-2009, 16:36
there will be more than one game played this episode

and nah everything was good, i told her about all the ensuing drama way ahead of time cause it she needed to know ahead of time
once she saw how it all played out on tv we can't help but laugh at it now
 
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zaius
VeteranXX
Old
842 - 04-21-2009, 16:44
did cj at least give you a blumpkin in the bathroom?
 
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psc777
VeteranXX
Old
843 - 04-21-2009, 16:45
Mark denies the kiss. But I think it did happen!
 
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Skibbi9
VeteranXX
Contributor
Old
844 - 04-21-2009, 16:55
I heard about a frat party from one of the cardio bunnies I slammed last week. Called me up and said I should make it if I get a chance. After another grueling workout, I decide to take Lex along with me.

We walk into the frat house, and it's exactly what I expected. 135 pounders in Abercrombie tshirts. Pathetic. I walk through the crowd in my aviators and beater, pushing guys at the party out of the way to establish Alpha dominance. We head into the kitchen, where one frat boy is making mixed drink for a few hotties. "Blender belongs to me now" I snarl at him, dump out the contents and begin to make my patented Mega Shake. Eight scoops of N-Large2, a jar of natty peanut butter, and 2 bananas all blended with lowfat milk. I blend up my mix, toast Lex in our bb.com shakers, and drink.

Apparently not all party participants liked the fact that me and Lex had stolen the blender. One girl had brought the "bouncer" over.

Bouncer: What's going on over here?
Lex: <taking off his aviators> We got a situation here boss, looks like 19 inch pythons on this guy.

I take off my aviators to get a better look.

Me: <giggling> Fatceps.

I notice a tattoo on the bouncer's arm, "Big Daddy" it says.

Me: Big Daddy?
Bouncer: <pissed off> Bigger than you.
Me: Maybe so, chief. But I'm swoler.

I reach into my bag and get out my body fat calipers.

Bouncer: Man, get those things away from me!
Me: <grinning> Aw, come on, lets see how much fat are on those fatceps of yours.
Bouncer: <crying> F**k you man, leave me alone! <He runs out of the room while I explode into laughter>

After about 20 more minutes of lat flaring around the party, I realize I have to take a huge ****. That Mega Shake wasn't sitting too well. I head into the bathroom with the newspaper. (I knew it was gonna be a messy struggle). A few minutes later, some drunk girl comes into the bathroom.

Drunk girl: Hi, ummm, I just wanted to say that you are really sexy and ummm***8230;
Me: Get the f**k out? I'm trying to **** in peace here
Drunk girl: Well, ummm, could I give you a blumpkin?
Me: F**k's a blumpkin?
Drunk girl: Well, its when you give someone head while they are taking a ****.

<I look her up and down. Decent sized **** and a good face.>

Me: Yeah why not. Just don't use your f**king teeth.

<I continue to read the paper while she blows me. She ended up swallowing every last drop.>

Drunk girl: Was it good?
Me: Not bad. I'd give it a C+

<Drunk girl lays down and passes out. I realize there is no toilet paper. So I take drunk girl's shirt and wipe my ass with it and walk out>

Me: Nice knowin' ya, sweetie.

I decide to find Lex so we can go home. On the way I run into two frat boys.

Frat boy 1: Excuse me? Do you think you could give us some weightlifting tips? I mean we don't want to get huge or anything, just Brad Pitt in fight Club, you know? Any pointers?

I felt the rage boiling up inside of me but kept my cool. I decided not to punch them out (no need to go back to prison). I bang on the door Lex is in.

Me: Let's f**King go, I'm tired and I want to go to sleep.
Lex: I got this ***** licking my nuts right now!
Me: Hurry up and nut in her face so we can go home. I'll start the car.

I walk outside to my beamer. I look at the car next to me, and Bouncer is in it, crying. Not only that, but he was driving a Jetta. I'm sorry, but if you are a bodybuilder you cannot drive a Volkswagen. You could be Ronnie F**kin' Coleman and you would get no respect from me if you are tooling around in a golf. The only time you could get head by driving a VW is from Gary down at the local Starbucks.

I lit up a cigar and waited for Lex to emerge. "Blumpkin," I thought to myself, smiling. "Doctor Swole, sometimes you even impress yourself."
 
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Mabelrode
VeteranXX
Contributor
Old
845 - 04-21-2009, 16:58
OK, who the ****ing **** made up the word 'blumpkin'? I mean, who authorized that for contextual use? Sounds like a ****ing accessory for clown wear. Get the **** outta here.
 
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tiu_sam
Veteran++
Old
846 - 04-21-2009, 19:50
too bad next season won't have a tribal warrior in it
 
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triple
VeteranXV
Old
847 - 04-21-2009, 22:02
****s on
 
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hastie
VeteranX
Old
848 - 04-21-2009, 22:15
nice...


women drivers... lol
 
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Last edited by hastie; 04-21-2009 at 22:18..
Luke
VeteranXX
Old
849 - 04-21-2009, 22:18
Meh, that's kinda retarded.
 
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triple
VeteranXV
Old
850 - 04-21-2009, 22:19
mark didnt lose!
 
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ayz
VeteranXX
Old
851 - 04-21-2009, 22:21
pgr4 upside down

what

they should force people to play fight night 3 with rock band drums
 
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NAT Mav
TW Racing++
Old
852 - 04-21-2009, 22:24
NOOOO not Chelsea.
 
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{X}Hitman
VeteranXV
Old
853 - 04-21-2009, 22:24
she was a ****ty gamer anyway
 
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ayz
VeteranXX
Old
854 - 04-21-2009, 22:27
ok what in the **** this is retarded
 
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BrokenWear
VeteranXX
Old
855 - 04-21-2009, 22:29
hahahahahha wtf is that thing?
 
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NAT Mav
TW Racing++
Old
856 - 04-21-2009, 22:30
It's that whole "pat your head, rub your tummy" trick.
 
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Luke
VeteranXX
Old
857 - 04-21-2009, 22:31
That's better than upside down racing.
 
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Paladin-5
VeteranXX
Old
858 - 04-21-2009, 22:31
this kind of sucks
 
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celtic108
VeteranX
Old
859 - 04-21-2009, 22:31
jamal is an ass
 
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telia
VeteranXV
Old
860 - 04-21-2009, 22:32
YOU JERK
 
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