OT: Very Sick Jokes(WARNING)

This isn't really sick, but its a funny racist one...

So in this army camp, a general needs 3 guys to do some work. He picks a white guy to be the chef, the black guy to do the janitorial work, and the chinese guy to get the supplies. He goes away and comes back in an hour to check up on them. The white guy is making the food and the black guy is cleaning the place but he cannot find the chinese guy. They all look around but he has disappeared. So they go to sleep. In the middle of the night, the chinese guy jumps out and says...






















SUPPLIES!!
 
I didn't read 15 pages of jokes so I hope I'm not repeating anything.




What the difference between a Ritz and a Lesbian.

One's a snack cracker and the other's a crack snaker.
 
i wasnt gonna read all the pages to see if this was there

how can you tell when you're at a gay barbeque?

all the hot dogs tasted like shit
 
A woman walks into her Doctors office and says "Doc, I think I may be reacting to this hormone treatment you've put me on"

The doctor replies "Oh really why do you say that?"

"Well, I've noticed the my muscles are a little bigger than normal and I'm growing hair in places where I didn't used to grow hair"

"Well, those are perfectly normal symptoms. Out of interest, where is this hair growing"

"On my testicles, which is another thing I wanted to ask you about..."



Another Dr joke:

A beautiful blonde goes to her doctor for her annual checkup. After a while she just can't take it any longer and says 'Doctor Doctor won't you please kiss me"

"No, I'm sorry Miss, you are very beutiful but that goes against my code of ethics"

A minute or two passes and again the blonde says "Doctor please won't you kiss me?"

"No, I'm sorry it's against my ethics"

One more minute goes by and the blonde again asks "Please doc, not even one kiss" to which the Dr replies "Look I told you it's against my code of ethics. I probably shouldn't even be fucking you."

Jewish Joke:

A jew and a chinese are at a resort laying next to one another. Suddenly the jew turns to the chinese dude and says:

"You know, I fucking hate you people"

The chinese guy is shocked and asks why?

"You're people bombed pearl harbour."

The chinese guy is like "What?? That was the Japense you moron"

"Chinese, Japenese, it's all the same to me!"

So a little while passes and the chinese guy suddenly turns to the jew and says:

"You know, I fucing hate YOU people" (never mind how he knows the dude is Jewish I'll leave that to another joke).

The Jewish guy is surprised and like "WTF? Whats wrong with us?"

"You sunk the titanic"

The jewish guy is bewildered and says "No, what are you talking about that was an iceberg!"

and the chinese guy says "Iceberg, Goldberg it's all the same to me..."

cheers, good thread
 
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so when a little white baby dies where does it go?

heaven

it gets wings and what do you call it?

an angel

so when a little mexican baby dies where does it go?

heaven

it gets wings and what do you call it?

an angel

so when a little black baby dies where does it go?

heaven

it gets wings and what do you call it?

a bat
 
How do you stop 5 black guys from raping a white girl?


Throw them a basketball




A attractive blonde goes into the gynocologists office for a checkup and lays back and closes her eyes. The doctor feeling around says "do you know what im doing? Im looking for cancer" then after a few minutes he sees he can easily take advantage of her and unzips his pants and starts to have his way with her, then he asks "do you know what im doing now" to which she replys "yes, getting gohnerrehea"
 
HappySniper said:
Michael Jackson and his new wife were sitting in a hospital room after she had just given birth to their brand new baby boy. The doctor walks in and Michael asks, "How long should we wait to have sex?" The doctor answers, "Wait until he's at least 14."
Click to expand...

:rofl:
 
2 lesbians and 2 gays were racing across the country from New York to San Diego. Who wins?





















Lesbians win, they are there lickety split, while the faggots are still packing thier shit :p
 
:bump:

need more dead baby raping jokes.

cause i cant smile in the morning without them.
 
A lady walks into a Furniture Store. She browses around, then spots the perfect leather sofa and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the fine leather upholstery, a loud fart escapes her. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and hopes a sales person doesn't pop up right now.

As she turns back, sure enough, there standing next to her is a salesman.

"Good day, Madame. How may we help you today?"

Very uncomfortably she asks, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely leather sofa?"

He answers, "Madame, I'm very sorry to say that if you farted just touching it, you are going to shit when you hear the price."
 
This guy walks into a bar with a white shirt that has in big black letters, "I HATE NIGGERS." He sits down and orders a beer. The bartender tells the man he can't serve the guy with that shirt on, to which the shirt wearer replies, "Shut the fuck up and give me a beer." The bartender does.

About 15 minutes later, a huge, ripped black man walks into the bar with a monkey on his shoulder and sits next to the shirt wearer. The bartender is scared because he doesn't want a big fight in his bar, so he thinks of a good reason to kick one out. He goes the black man and says, "Sir, you can't bring animals in here..." The black man looks shocked and goes, "THIS?! Oh hell nah, watch!"

He snaps his finger and the monkey jumps off his shoulder, grabs an empty beer mug, fires a couple quarters into the jukebox, and runs from table to table dancing and collecting money from people. His final stop is on the man with the "I HATE NIGGERS." shirt, and the monkey does a little dance. The man pulls out his wallet, puts a ten in the beer mug, and pats the monkey on the head. The monkey goes back on the black man's shoulder, and they both leave.

The bartender is shocked and goes to the shirt wearer. "I don't get it man. You come in with that shirt on, and then you just give this guy his money for his monkey's tricks... What gives?"

The guy looks up and says, "Hey man, I got nothing against the kids."
 
Just heard this one..

US Attorney General Ashcroft is visiting an elementary school. After the typical civics presentation to the class, he announces, "All right, boys and girls, you can all ask me questions now."

A young boy named bobby raises his hands and says, "I have three questions:
1.How did bush win the election with fewer votes than Gore?
2.Why are you using the US Civil Liberties act to limit Americans' Civil liberties?
3.Why hasn't the U.S caught Osama bin Laden yet?"

Just then the bell sounds and all the kids run out to the playground.

Fifteen minutes later, the kids come back in class and again Ashcroft says, "I'm sorry we were interrupted by the bell. Now, you can all ask me questions."

A young girl named Charlene raises hr hand and says,"I have five questions:
1.How did bush win the election with fewer votes than Gore?
2.Why are you using the US Civil Liberties act to limit Americans' Civil liberties?
3.Why hasn't the U.S caught Osama bin Laden yet?
4.Why did the bell go off 20 mins early?
5.Where's Bobby
 
I just read the whole thread.

joke, joke . . . jooooooooke.

AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA DEAR SWEET MOTHER OF GOD AAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAA!!!

a dyslexic man walked into a bra.

^^ those 2 jokes are the funniest shit in the whole goddamned thread.
 
Eight year-olds, Dude.
Click to expand...

No pun intended, tho Im prolly the only one who finds this amusing:
girldead.jpg
 
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