'polyamory' and idiots from tw who believe in it

nigafool said:
i'd say if you're willing to share "your girl" with someone else, she's not really "your girl"

but who am i to argue with obibun of "look idiots i know everything about women i hang out near them" fame
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You seem to know what you're talking about here, but also seem like the type who would be jealous if your girlfriend was hanging out with her friends instead of you.

I don't see a problem if my girlfriend wants to get sexual with another chick. For me, that's hot as shit (assuming the other girl is attractive). I don't really consider it cheating either, and would not be jealous - and maybe that's just genetic seeing as there's no dick in the equation ergo no children etc. etc. etc.

As long as I'm involved somehow, anyway. If she's just sneaking off in the night to be with some girl, I'd probably be pretty hurt by it. If she says, 'I really want to go down on that hot girl over there if you want to fuck me while it happens', I'd be game, sure as hell.
 
my gf is hanging out with her friends tonight. shrug.

i don't see what not wanting your gf to fuck other people (in front of you or not) has to do with being a jealous control-freak.

i will admit i shared your opinion when i was younger and didn't know what it was like to actually care about someone.
 
I mean how far are you gonna take your hardline?

Say you're out with some friends and your girlfriend and another friend (female) get a little drunk and decide it'd be fun to make out a little bit. I have a tough time stepping in to stop it in that situation y'know..
 
You people do realize that cannot judge the reactions/actions of others based off of your reactions/actions... right?
 
you're not really understanding my position, i think.

this isn't something i have to constantly ponder based on my gf's actions. i've been with this girl for almost 6 years because she's a good fit (mentally and vaginally). she's just not that type of girl.

i have a friend who is that type of girl, and she does that shit all the time. coincidentally, she also has one of the unhealthiest relationships i've ever seen.
 
nigafool said:
my gf is hanging out with her friends tonight. shrug.

i don't see what not wanting your gf to fuck other people (in front of you or not) has to do with being a jealous control-freak.

i will admit i shared your opinion when i was younger and didn't know what it was like to actually care about someone.
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Fair enough.

It's not about being a jealous control-freak as such. I just don't see any reason to be jealous in particular?

It's a completely different situation, I think.

Like, obviously if she wants to do shit with another guy, there's all the more reason to be jealous - you're a guy, and she wants to be with another one. That kind of puts him above you. Jealous++

With a girl though.. well, why not?

It's hot.. and it's not as though she's replacing you at all - you're still the male in her life. So where does the jealousy come in? Is it just a general loss of control in general over her during sex, or just wanting her to yourself? Both of these are fine for people in a relationship I suppose.

I just don't see any reason for me in particular to get jealous. I'm still the guy in her life, you know? And if she wants to do something with me and another chick that I consider hot as shit, why not?

ed- Personally, and this is just my jealous personality talking, but I'd much rather have my girlfriend thinking/being curious about doing shit with other girls than with other men.
 
nigafool said:
you're not really understanding my position, i think.

this isn't something i have to constantly ponder based on my gf's actions. i've been with this girl for almost 6 years because she's a good fit (mentally and vaginally). she's just not that type of girl.

i have a friend who is that type of girl, and she does that shit all the time. coincidentally, she also has one of the unhealthiest relationships i've ever seen.
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That's a very standoffish post while the rest of yours in this thread scream "I know what's best for everyone"
 
the "jealous control-freak" comment was in relation to you suggesting my views make me the sort of person who gets jealous when she's hanging out with her friends. that's what jealous control-freaks do. i was simply pointing out that i don't understand the correlation just because i don't want to be with a girl who is into fucking other people.

and why is a girl fucking a girl different than a girl fucking a guy?

i mean i understand it in the "lesbianism is hot" sort of way, but i don't see how it's more emotionally meaningless just because there's no penis involved. it's that very assumption that gets you into trouble after getting into a 'polyamorous' situation.
 
I think girls just do it to tease guys. They don't really enjoy it more than a dick.

edit: yeah that wasn't the word I wanted to use, but I don't know what is so... yeah.
 
anyways scourge my point isn't that "i know what's best for everyone"

i have no problem with people who do this 'polyamory' shit

just don't pretend your relationship is 'good' or 'working'. it's pretty much the definition of 'not working'.

i'm also not knocking people who have threesomes. have as many threesomes as you want. they're fun and i'm not denying that... but there's a difference between the girl you invite to a threesome and the girl you marry.
 
nigafool said:
anyways scourge my point isn't that "i know what's best for everyone"

just don't pretend your relationship is 'good' or 'working'. it's pretty much the definition of 'not working'.
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These two sentences are in contradiction of one another.
 
not at all. lots of people are in relationships that aren't really relationships anymore. lots of them even pretend it's still a great relationship, regardless of the truth.
 
nigafool said:
they're fun and i'm not denying that... but there's a difference between the girl you invite to a threesome and the girl you marry.
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I'll agree with you here. My point is that if I'm dating a girl and she wants to try it with me and another girl, hey, no problem, why not.

I'd assume that if we're good enough together to get married, that by the time she marries me she'll have grown out of that.

Still, I don't see a problem with a 3rd chick entering into a relationship when you're young.
 
well it would be a boring world if we were all alike

but i'm personally not down with this polyamory shit ;> if you want to fuck another girl so bad then you're obviously not with the right one
 
nigafool said:
not at all. lots of people are in relationships that aren't really relationships anymore. lots of them even pretend it's still a great relationship, regardless of the truth.
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They are clearly in contradiction.

example.

My point isn't that "all black people commit crime"

Just don't pretend that if you are black you haven't stolen something.


You are painting with broad brushes. Opinion is different from fact. In your opinion people cannot have a "working" polyamorous relationship, the fact is you are incorrect when speaking for everyone.
 
Wraithed, what I think he means is that a sane, chemically balanced individual cannot have a working polyamorous relationship. We're not meant for it, genetically it's doomed to fail.

However there are plenty of fucked up people out there who probably have fantastic polyamorous relationships.
 
if you're young and don't give that much of a shit about the relationship, invite whoever you want into bed. i'm not knocking sexual exploration/experimentation at all.
 
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