Jokes that make you lose faith in humanity.
- Thread starter Musashi
- Start date
SO THIS ONE TIME MY BEST FRIEND CAME OVER TO MY HOUSE AND HE SAID WE SHOULD GO FOR A DRIVE SO WE GOTTED INTO THE CAR AND WE DID DROVE FOR ALL DESTINATIONS OF THE CITIES OF LOS ANGELES IN THE CALIFORNIA. ALSO WE HAD SOME SOUP AND DINNERS AT THE LOCALLY FOOD PLACE. WE HAD VERY GOOD TIME FOR ALL.
Sp!nfusor Salad
Veteran X
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No, we don't have THIS one:
FFaddic was driving Nosemaster and me home one drunken night. Nose was to be dropped off first.
"Hey Nose," I said, "I REALLY have to make my bladder gladder. Can I please use your bathroom?"
"No. My girlfriend hates the splashing. It wakes her up."
"Oh come on please. I REALLY have to go! maybe I could do it in the bushes over there."
"No!" Nose tersely replied, "The neighbors are already watching. I can already see Mrs. Blosnofsky in her upstairs window with her binoculers."
"But I REALLY REALLY have to go."
"Come on Nose," implored FFaddicles, "I don't want Zoph messing up my Mom's car!"
"All right! All right!" Nose conceded, "Quietly sneak into the kitchen and use the sink."
"THE SINK?!!" I exclaimed.
"Shush man! The neighbors! Just be quick about it would you? And do it QUIETLY!"
"All right all right!" as I ran in there full tilt and knocked over the kitchen table as I literally ripped my clothes off. Nose was outside dying a little inside. FFaddicles was laughing hysterically in the car. The girlfriend stirred around upstairs as lights went on all over the neighborhood.
But this wasn't the worst of it.
You can just imagine Nose's shock and horror as I shouted at him from the wrecked kitchen in my drunken stupor, "HEY NOSE! Uhh... you got any toilet paper?"
FFaddic was driving Nosemaster and me home one drunken night. Nose was to be dropped off first.
"Hey Nose," I said, "I REALLY have to make my bladder gladder. Can I please use your bathroom?"
"No. My girlfriend hates the splashing. It wakes her up."
"Oh come on please. I REALLY have to go! maybe I could do it in the bushes over there."
"No!" Nose tersely replied, "The neighbors are already watching. I can already see Mrs. Blosnofsky in her upstairs window with her binoculers."
"But I REALLY REALLY have to go."
"Come on Nose," implored FFaddicles, "I don't want Zoph messing up my Mom's car!"
"All right! All right!" Nose conceded, "Quietly sneak into the kitchen and use the sink."
"THE SINK?!!" I exclaimed.
"Shush man! The neighbors! Just be quick about it would you? And do it QUIETLY!"
"All right all right!" as I ran in there full tilt and knocked over the kitchen table as I literally ripped my clothes off. Nose was outside dying a little inside. FFaddicles was laughing hysterically in the car. The girlfriend stirred around upstairs as lights went on all over the neighborhood.
But this wasn't the worst of it.
You can just imagine Nose's shock and horror as I shouted at him from the wrecked kitchen in my drunken stupor, "HEY NOSE! Uhh... you got any toilet paper?"