I'll give you a serious answer.
He's a LARPer. That right there is reason enough. Beyond that, he desperately wants to be metrosexual and believes he has style while exuding nothing but poor taste. He also has extremely rich parents (not birth parents, he decided he liked the rich people better so they adopted him) that pay for everything for him. They bought him a condo in SoCal and pay all his bills while he runs around humping the baristas at Starbucks©®™ and snuggling with his RAZR©®™ phone. He's proud of all of this, by the way.
Oh, and he has atrocious spelling. He says he's dyslexic, but in all likelihood, he's just plain stupid. [strike]Though, to be fair, his posts in the last few months have been predominantly legible.[/strike]